Signing On

Well today was the day I had to sign on for the first time in a lot of years.
I had submitted my claim nearly a month ago and have yet to hear from them or get a penny :(
The wife and I had signing on times of 2.05 and 2.10pm so we turn up at 2pm and ask where we have to go? as the layout is all open plan and not as regimented as it used to be.
We are finally shown who to see and arrive at her desk at 2.06pm and greeted with "you're late, I only have 5 minute time slots", so I showed her the time and pointed out mine was 2.10pm so I was actually early and as we are man and wife we could do it together.
But Miss stroppy moo wasn't happy and insisted on treating us like low life scum :(
"What jobs have you applied for" she says, so I get out the e-mails sent to me by the online job search company and a copy of the local paper with the 2 jobs I had rung up about but I'm stopped in my tracks because I haven't written it down on the special "looking for work" form that they didn't give me on my initial interview! "you have to put it on this form" she says, so I show her all the paperwork they gave me and sure enough I didn't have one.
Next I ask when I'm likely to receive any benefits as I had to borrow money to get to the job centre as we are completely broke and it's been a month, she mentions something about the wrong signing day being listed on the computer? and that I have to talk to benefits "so where abouts do I talk to them?" I ask and she points out some telephones "go over there and press button B".
So off we go to the phones, there are two labelled benefits and one has an out of order sign on it, also there is a queue of people waiting for it.
I patiently wait and eventually get to use it, I press button B and get a choice of options jobseekers is no.2 so I press 2 and get the message "all operators are busy please ring back later", I try again and the same message so I try option 1 instead and get a real person :)
after telling me I'd called the wrong department I explained the problem and unlike her colleague she was very helpful and helped me through the process.
My claim still hadn't been processed (as it takes ten days), I pointed out it had been 29 days so she agreed to label it as urgent and I "might" hear from them this week.

Makes you wonder how so many people are supposed to be getting money from them by fraud when it is this hard to get a penny from them with a genuine claim?

The Job Search

Have applied for a few local jobs, but yet to hear anything :(
So I registered with an online employment agency which is supposedly the biggest in the UK.
Not a great start as I specified a travelling distance of up to 30 miles, which is usually about an hour in rush hour which seemed reasonable.
So they've sent me the same 2 jobs every day since registering, the first reasonably local which I applied for straight away through them, despite this they send it to me again every day.
The second that they advise me to apply for is in Slough which is 60 miles away as the crow flies or 76 miles by road if you avoid central London, also the job has a requirement of speaking fluent German and I indicated I only had basic French as a language skill.

Not promising so far :(

2009 - Up Shit Creek Without A Paddle

Well I'll wish anyone who reads this a Happy New Year and hope you have a good one.
For myself it's a case of the only way is up (although there is a possibility of dropping some more).
So I'm out of a job and almost penniless due to a combination of pride, stupidity, over generosity, and generally burying my head in the sand for the last 6 months.

I finally signed on as unemployed just before Christmas but it seems I have to wait till mid January to get a penny, and I expect to have to answer a lot more questions before that as they've failed to contact me in this last 3 weeks?
The bank cancelling my overdraft was the final nail in my stubborn resistance to claiming benefits (although I've been eligible for 6 months), pride or stupidity made me believe I could still bring in the money without going back into the mind numbing employment of previous years but I failed.
My hobby of online gambling brings in the money but not enough to survive on, (before anyone thinks I've gambled my money away I can honestly say I'm one of the few who uses a common sense approach to it and have made a tidy profit over the years) I operate a very methodical low risk low stake policy which on average brings in £50-£100 a week profit but for the hours spent it's not a good hourly rate, and to be honest I've never really liked horse racing so after a few hours of play I'm bored witless, also being at home has so many other distractions so I really don't spend the time I should on my one means of income.
Over generosity is another problem, much as I love my kids between them I've loaned them thousands of pounds which they promised to pay back but I've yet to see a penny, and as they are my family I don't want to pressure them as they're not really making enough themselves.

After 15+ years of solid working since my last period of unemployment it's been a nice break and I had the finances to cover it for the early part, but it's time to get back into work and this is the part I'm getting worried about as most jobs I've looked at are offering salaries which are a fraction of what I was earning 2 years ago, and the lack of any replies to my applications is leading me to think the age thing is a problem? when I last applied for work I was early thirties now I'm late forties although I don't feel any different and I certainly know more than I did then.
The job centre has been an experience as the people I've dealt with all seemed computer illiterate and lacking in people skills, so when I asked what jobs I could do it was hard not to say "yours" :)
The last woman I spoke to there seemed to lack any experience of the real world as she looked at my CV and saw I'd got certificates for car maintenance and told me most surgeons had started out as car mechanics due to their ability to work with their hands??, I couldn't resist telling her to put my name down for a surgical post (I've seen Holby City so it should be a doddle) :)
My computer skills are also a problem as my only qualification was gained over 25 years ago in the days of main frames, and despite using computers nearly every day since then it doesn't look as good as most modern qualifications.
The things I'm really good at with computers (always first point of call with the 200+ workers at my last job) tend to be slightly illegal so don't sit well with employers, A life of crime beckoned but I'm just to damn honest to profit from illegal activities so I'm probably screwed.

Anyway as 2009 begins I've got £4.39 and the remnants of some tobacco in my rolly tin, no job, no benefits, no money in the bank, credit card maxed out, a pile of bills, a sick wife and a dodgy arm, Surely the only way is up?
The strange thing about all this is that I'm now getting the buzz I haven't had since I was in this situation in the early nineties, money in the bank with a regular job and a cosy lifestyle tends to put your brain into neutral, now it's finally got into gear and I feel more alive than I have in years?
Might be my last post for a while as it's only a matter of time till the cable company cut me off as I cancelled their direct debit, and I need to be nice to the mortgage company to keep possession of this place.

Keep smiling people, I will :)